I set out for the game. First of the new non league football season. You can taste the anticipation.....................or it could be last nights curry.
My son has been bouncing out of bed every day this week with excitement for his first ever football match.
I spend the walk to the ground breaking it to him gently that:-
1. Sammy the Stag probably won't make it into the starting line up
2. There will not be as many goals in today's game as he watches on Football Beebies
(Sunday morning Match of the Day.)
I fear a tepid nil-nil draw will put him off football for life.
We pick up a program and meet with friends before heading into the stadium.
I love that first sight of the pitch after climbing the stairs and taking a look out across the ground.
I find myself sat next to one of Mansfield Town's better looking female fans for the whole game. Not only that but she talks football with insight and intellect. I am beginning to think this could be a good day.
Mansfield start a little shakily but a goal after 15 minutes settles them down and they comfortably outplay Crawley Town for a 4-0 win.
Not quite like watching Brazil but I'm thinking a darn sight better than watching Crawley Town.
For the 57 fans that made the trip, I salute you.
The papers will report the 1st and 3rd goals were controversial but I have a lesson for the Crawley defender who clutched his head on the floor until he noticed a Mansfield Town player bearing down on goal.
If you're really injured:-
DO stay on the ground clutching your head,preferably lying as still as possible.
DON'T bolt upright, jump to your feet, sprint to charge down the ball, deflect it into your own net from 20 yards watching it loop over your goalie, only then to return to a prone position hoping the referee was asleep for all of the above and will cancel out the goal.
He will probably feel a little silly tonight.
He was substituted a few minutes after the goal I think more out of shame and embarrassment than actual injury.
As for the third I am not sure that offside actually works if all the defenders clear the area about 3 seconds after the centre forward has received the ball and is one on one with the keeper but well done to the Crawley players for trying.
My son will now think that everytime we come there will be lots of goal mouth action, 4 goals and more importantly smiley faces on every stags fan in the stadium. Chants of 'We are top of the league' was maybe a tad taking the piss but when you start the season like that you can forgive the fans for their optimism.
Leaving the stadium I treat my son and lucky mascot to chicken mcfaggots at the local macdonaldinho's pondering the question on everyones lips:-
Which is the largest European city never to have had a top-flight team?
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